I am most nervous about my physiology test. The material is very interesting and I am fascinated by the class, however there is a lot of very specific information and technological terms that I'm going to have to learn before this test. At the beginning of the semester I planned on studying a little bit every day, reviewing my notes later that day after class, going to my professor's office hours when necessary; the usual requirements for staying on top of a lot of material. But I never fully implemented that plan, I've kept up with parts of it but not enough where I feel prepared for this test!
Now it is over a week before my tests, and I am trying to start studying while keeping up with my other homework. But I'm doing classic "Sarah logic." I'm avoiding the tough part. I'll do all my other work, maybe even read a little bit ahead just so I don't have to open my physiology notes and find out all of the information I don't know. I'll bribe myself with little breaks if I can make it through six slides of information... SIX! That's pathetic. I know that if I studied and worked hard that I would learn the material with plenty of time to spare before the test, but because I am so apprehensive about it, I'm avoiding it. If I don't know about it then it doesn't exist right? This is the "Sarah logic."
I was thinking about my "logic" this afternoon, and God pointed out to me that school work isn't the only area that I apply my "Sarah logic." In my life I will avoid making changes that I know are going to be difficult and lengthy, because I know they are going to be a challenge and I am afraid of failing. If I pretend those areas of weakness aren't there, then maybe I won't have to fix them for a while longer. But this "logic" doesn't fix anything, in fact it tends to make things worse.
When I avoid I get anxious, I get tired, and I try to control things that I have absolutely no control over. Through spending time in God's word I've realized that the changes he wants me to make are for the best, always. That I have to start with baby steps to end up going anywhere, otherwise I'm going to become cemented in one spot or complacent. God also realizes that this isn't going to be easy, which is why he promises to never leave me and to love me through the challenges. He throws my "Sarah logic" out the window.
Philippians 4:6-7 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
1 Peter 5:7 "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."
1 Corinthians 9:26-27 "Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize."
Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."
Don't doubt that the Lord has given you anything you can't handle, any change that is too big. He is with you and knows your worries and fears. God has a perfect plan for those that love him, but you must surrender control. And in this trial and change don't be aimless, do the hard work so you can bask with God in the joy that will come!
*Joy for the Day: Beginning the week after a fabulous weekend with family and a sweet friend! And then having God use something very concrete in my life to speak truth into my life.
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